Post by TiniWini on Sept 1, 2014 22:34:11 GMT 7
As kids, we'd get that twinkle in our eyes every time we rest our eyes on the loveliest item in the toy store. By all means we'd try to make our moms buy it for us. When they don't get it, we throw tantrums and refuse to walk out of the toy store. When we get it, we couldn't wait to go home and admire it, and then play with it.
Then we grow up. We get into relationships. There seems to be a trend in these relationships, similar to that childhood experience of getting a new toy. The novelty of the first time you see each other, the first date, the first time you hold her hand, the first kiss, the first time she said "I love you". It starts out with a lot of kilig. You flood your text messages with smileys, you ask her what she's doing almost every hour, you try to find out as much as you can about her, you write songs for her, you listen to everything she says as if missing a single word would mean so damn much.
It grows and grows, continuously building up. And then it stops. You know her so well you begin thinking you know everything about her. You seldom text with any smileys, and you reply with a "K". You care for her but you don't bother to show it. She tells you what she feels and you ignore it, or you just talk about what you feel. And you stop writing those songs that made her believe she meant the world to you. She has to tell you everything before she makes a move--you just care, but you react with hostility when she asks why you won't let her go out with her guy friends.
While before, it was all about making her happy, it's now all about keeping you happy. Yes, it may be because of too much familiarity. You know she'll be there for you anyway. Same old smile, same old laugh, same old little voice when she cries. Maybe you've grown so used to holding her hand that you've forgotten how it felt the first time. Maybe you've grown so used to her texts that you've forgotten about how silly you were in that smile you made whenever she'd reply to your messages. This is when the two of you are unhappy--you, because she just isn't doing enough to keep you happy; she, because you just won't appreciate her efforts, and because you no longer make an effort to surprise her and make her feel important.
So what do you do when the novelty has gone? Do you look for another novel item and throw her into your pile of old toys? Or do you bring the novelty back by learning to appreciate her the way you once did with innocent eyes?
Then we grow up. We get into relationships. There seems to be a trend in these relationships, similar to that childhood experience of getting a new toy. The novelty of the first time you see each other, the first date, the first time you hold her hand, the first kiss, the first time she said "I love you". It starts out with a lot of kilig. You flood your text messages with smileys, you ask her what she's doing almost every hour, you try to find out as much as you can about her, you write songs for her, you listen to everything she says as if missing a single word would mean so damn much.
It grows and grows, continuously building up. And then it stops. You know her so well you begin thinking you know everything about her. You seldom text with any smileys, and you reply with a "K". You care for her but you don't bother to show it. She tells you what she feels and you ignore it, or you just talk about what you feel. And you stop writing those songs that made her believe she meant the world to you. She has to tell you everything before she makes a move--you just care, but you react with hostility when she asks why you won't let her go out with her guy friends.
While before, it was all about making her happy, it's now all about keeping you happy. Yes, it may be because of too much familiarity. You know she'll be there for you anyway. Same old smile, same old laugh, same old little voice when she cries. Maybe you've grown so used to holding her hand that you've forgotten how it felt the first time. Maybe you've grown so used to her texts that you've forgotten about how silly you were in that smile you made whenever she'd reply to your messages. This is when the two of you are unhappy--you, because she just isn't doing enough to keep you happy; she, because you just won't appreciate her efforts, and because you no longer make an effort to surprise her and make her feel important.
So what do you do when the novelty has gone? Do you look for another novel item and throw her into your pile of old toys? Or do you bring the novelty back by learning to appreciate her the way you once did with innocent eyes?
